A teacher you work with has just finished her master’s degree and you want to send her your congratulations. If you thought about giving her flowers, that would be an excellent choice. Flowers make a great all-occasion gift, whether you’re sending congratulations or condolences. The trick to making your gift stand out is by following proper etiquette and, if possible, finding a way to personalize your gift.

Here are 5 occasions when you may want to send flowers with tips on making the right choice.

Graduation/Congratulations

An excellent way to personalize a gift of flowers for this occasion is to choose colors that somehow symbolize the celebration. So if your school colors are red and white, and you’re congratulating a colleague, sending her a bouquet of red and white tulips would not only be beautiful but full of school spirit, too. You can use the same approach for a graduation—using the school’s colors as your guide. Take that graduation gift up a notch by finding out where the graduate is going to college and then adding in flowers that represent that school’s colors or even the state flower for where the college is located.

Hostess Gift

It’s always a good idea to show up at someone’s home with a small gift for your host or hostess, and when it comes to flowers, always bring the low-maintenance kind. In other words, someone hosting a party or dinner is likely on a schedule and if you hand her a bunch of hand-cut flowers, you’ve now given her more work to do—finding a vase, filling it with water, arranging the flowers, etc. In this instance a potted plant or flowers that are already in a container would work best.

Get Well

Bright cheery-hued flowers are a great way to brighten the day of someone who’s sick or recovering from an illness. Consider sending low-odor flowers in case the person is sensitive to smells—for example, when someone is receiving chemotherapy treatment. Ask your florist about hybrid flowers, which are usually less scented than other varieties because they have been bred for their looks but not their scent. Other flowers that can be naturally less fragrant are certain lilies and hydrangeas.

Sympathy/Condolences

If someone you’re close to has lost a loved one, you have the option of sending flowers to the funeral service or the person’s home. Traditionally, these kinds of flowers have muted colors and usually come 3 ways: as a wreath, a spray (so it can lay on a coffin) and a traditional arrangement (almost like a centerpiece). To add a personal touch to any of these kinds of funeral flowers, you could include the deceased’s favorite bloom (if you know it) or one that has a connection with that person in another way (Black-Eyed Susans for someone named Susan, for example). Finally, if the family has asked for donations instead of flowers, you should respect their wishes.

Birthdays

Flowers make an ideal birthday gift, especially if you live far away from that person. “My mother has always loved fresh flowers,” says Jeff Schwartz, 44, a 4th-grade teacher in Wilton, Connecticut. “After my parents moved to Florida, sending flowers for my mother’s birthday became a tradition. Since we don’t see her regularly, it’s harder to keep track of what she might need, but I know she always enjoys getting flowers.” You can personalize birthday flowers by choosing a variety that has some significance to the recipient. For example, someone who loves purple would surely love having a gift of purple lilacs, irises and lavender show up on her doorstep.

Regardless of what occasion you’re choosing to recognize with flowers, always be sure to include a hand-written message—even if you have to dictate it to the florist over the phone. This helps for practical reasons (the person knows who the flowers are from) but it also allows you to personalize your good wishes so that your gift means even more to the recipient.